Gradutation Day

My little man Jack is now officially a 1st grader. I don't know why...but it just seemed right when Laila graduated from Kindergarten. But it seems all wrong for Jack. He's too young...he's not ready...I'm not ready!

I have to give a shout-out to his teacher Ms. Chaddick. Four years ago I helped out in her kindergarten room during testing week - at the time I thought "She would be perfect for Jack". So I prayed and held my breath and sure enough, she was Jack's teacher. Now, I don't know how she feels about it - but in my eyes she was perfect for him! He's not a lover of reading or crafts which is a huge part of Kindergarten - but she was able to keep his interest and by the end of the year he actually chose to read instead of playing the computer before bed.

So, ready or not, here he comes.....

Terrible Two's

Matthew Daniel has turned 2. I thought "Not a problem...he's so naughty already two can't be worse". Insert BIG bite of humble pie! We've entered the stage of screaming...for no reason...It's mine...I had it first....NO!".

But I would be amiss if I didn't record all the times when Matt does something so cute we all just look at him with adoring eyes. For example - Jack has been gone this week with Eric and Matt has missed him. Today when he talked to him on the phone he kept waving at the phone as if Jack could see him saying "I miss you Jackie...I miss you Jackie". Why he calls him Jackie I don't know - my suspicion is that he knows Jack hates being called that...but still...it's so cute! Or when I'm doing my exercise DVDs and he tries his hardest to do them with me. He cracks me up when he can't get his body into a yoga pose and he looks up at me saying "I can't, I can't". At times I have flashbacks to Laila's toddler years - he loves to color and has put his mark on many of my walls. Laila would do the same thing. And sometimes he reminds me of Jack, his love for cars and his obsession with Blues Clues. But mostly he is unique to himself. He loves music and requests the B-I-B-L-E anytime we start singing. He absolutely loves reading and brings books all day long wanting to be read to. He's a big Dr. Seuss fan. Right now we are stuck on "There's a Wocket in My Pocket"

I sometimes wonder if he dreams at night of his mama saying "Stop that Matthew". I've been trying to intentionally scoop him up more and love on him - using positive words! Good Job Matt! You're such a good boy!

He has enjoyed going up to Jack's school once a week for lunch time. His birthday fell on a day when we would be there so I made cupcakes and the kids sang to him. He was very pleased!

Now We Are Six...

When I was One,
I had just begun.
When I was Two,
I was nearly new.
When I was Three
I was hardly me.
When I was Four,
I was not much more.
When I was Five, I was just alive.
But now I am Six, I'm as clever as clever,So I think I'll be six now for ever and ever.

My strapping 10 lb. baby boy is now a whopping 40 lb. handsome young man! I must confess that I felt a bit guilty over the years at the lack-luster way we had celebrated his birthday. You see, his first birthday Eric wasn't home so when Eric came through town we shoved a candle in a piece of store bought cake and took a picture. I mean, every child HAS to have a first birthday picture.

The years are kinda muddy between 2-4...but I'm pretty sure it was basically a repeat. So age 5 I decided the child MUST have a party and a party he had - at the bowling ally. But of course, our little purse cannot afford parties every year so no party was planned for turning 6. In fact, I secretly hoped it would be like years past that he wouldn't even know it was his birthday so we could just celebrate it on whichever day Eric landed in town. Um, let me just say, once a child enters Kindergarten, those days are OVER! He has talked of nothing but his birthday for weeks now. I finally realized Eric had to be here so we arranged the schedule to make it so. I didn't need to worry about planning anything, Jack had it all planned for me. His birthday song must be sung with the "cha, cha, cha's" included. I must bring cupcakes to his school and eat lunch with him. And so it went. I got such a kick out of him enjoying being Prince for the day. He jumped on our bed the morning of his special day and said "Here I am, the birthday boy!" (if only he had entered the world so easily and cheerfully!).

At some point in the day he came up to me and told me he was in love with me

and that I was the most beautiful mommy! There are lovers and fighters -

Jack is a little lover ...and for the time being...he's mine~

People Say....

"I just don't know how you do it with your husband gone all the time...". I usually just laugh and try to point out that I don't have to cook every night, do his laundry, pick up his junk etc. But sometimes I just want to scream - "I don't want to do it alone - why don't you help inestead of just patting me on the back verbally!" Today for instance: A normal day but for some reason (perhaps because my 1 year old has been sick for a week and is a total whine-bag!)I about came un-glued when my cupboard was squeeking horribly and the thought crossed my mind "I need a man!". It sounds very trite when I write it - but it was just one more thing for me to do. I don't have time in my day to find the WD40 and fix a cupboard. Oh yes, and then there is the lawn that looks like the amazon. Not to mention the truck that needs thoroughly clean.

You know, that person I would look down my nose at and wonder why in the world they dont get their crap together? That's ME.

If I could get my work done with my face on the floor I would try today because my heart needs a humility make-over.

And I wonder, no, I know...how many times I say the same types of things to others instead of sticking out my hand to help because I'm far too busy with my own little life.

Happy New Year!

Make a Smilebox greeting

What the heck?

Have you ever had a year that spins you so hard your neck hurts? Actually, my whole body hurts after this year. I don't like to go in-depth on my blog but it's after 4 a.m. - I've been up for a long while and I realized I've been so lax on this blog. It's one of the many things that has gone by the wayside this year. I laid for a long time thinking about this year and wondering just WHAT I had wanted me to learn. I know that I learned a lot about myself. A lot that wasn't pretty.

It all started with the realization that our *surprise* child was going to change not just the number in our family. It meant that financially private school was out the window. No big deal, we can home-school for one year! HA! I learned that I have limitations that are real - not just in my head. 

• I learned to eat humble pie - that some children really do throw fits, scream, will not schedule, eat all the time and never stop moving - and it's not because the parents don't discipline.
• I learned that if you build the barn before planting and harvesting the field you will fail.
• I learned that legalism is truly toxic and poisons not just yourself, but those around you.
• I learned from good friends how to be a better friend.
• I learned that if you aren't gifted in an area - don't take on that responsibility.
• I've learned that God is Great, beer is good...and people are crazy!!!!! LOL. Sorry, just had to add that one. :)

I'm still learning. I'm learning that relationships are messy, hard and a big pain! 

I've also learned that my sisters will love me on my most un-loveable days:


My friends will overlook my "Northern-ness":



My children are priceless:


I'm learning to be grateful too. Something that is a huge need in my life.

Matt-matt is One!

My baby is one.

As those who know me well will understand - I greet each new birthday with joy!!! A year older, a year of memories, a new year to make more, a year closer to independence!

Wow though, what a year. There is truly never a dull moment with Matthew! He is hot or cold. Laughing or screaming. Active or sleeping. No in between. This is exhausting and yet so simple.

Laila gets him up each morning because she wants him to like her the most and she reasons that if she is getting him up out of bed he will love her for it! Jack gets a kick out making Matt-matt laugh and they have fun wrestling together...though he longs for the day when he doesn't have to share his room. :)

Matthew still has no teeth....has decided he doesn't need to walk 'cause that's what parent's arms are for and can say several words (peek-a-boo, hi, bye, thank you, laila, jack, daddy, nana). 

I love you Matt-Matt.